Month of Discipline Windup

Tomorrow will be my last post for awhile because I will be concentrating all of my writing a full novel in a month, a mental marathon that will surely challenge me in a very productive way. Tomorrow's post will detail the last of Benjamin Franklin's areas of self improvement, which I think will require me to be more alert than I currently am at this time of night (morning). Today's post will just try to reflect on the month of discipline, the lessons learned and the setbacks and accomplishments encountered along the way.

Firstly, from this month I have realized the magnitude of the trek yet in front of me to reach self-discipline mastery. It alway seems like self-discipline is easy when you picture it in your mind, but the day-to-day trials of willpower often are unbearable. For example, it seems easy to start a new diet; you say 'sure, I just won't eat that bad food.' But then, you find yourself craving some greasy food after a hard day of work, when your will-power is at its weakest. This is the moment of truth, when making the correct choice is so difficult. I am not at the point yet where I am immune to such temptation when I am at my weakest. Someday, I hope to be at that point.

There are two accomplishments that I am particularily proud of: Not drinking for three weeks, and a day of fasting. My friends drink alot, and so I often find myself drinking alot (up to 3-4x a week). For three weeks I avoided beverages, instead substituting caffeine for alcohol. I learned that not drinking is something I can handle, although drinking occasionally is fun. There were certainly times in which I was very tempted to get a beer, because everyone else was drinking, and to avoid the inevitable ribbing for not drinking. However, I stayed true. The other accomplishment that I was proud of was fasting for a day. Going twenty four hours without food was difficult for me, although not unbearable. It gave such purpose to that day, though. It was a day I won't soon forget. The day lasted forever, and I was productive and focused. The last few hours were the hardest, and the flavor of the food when the fast was finally broken was delicious. In both cases, I proved that when I promise myself I will accomplish something, I can keep true to my word.

This had led to my next two challenges, which are both very ambitious and hopefully will keep my self-discipline progress strong. I am aiming to run a marathon in February, which will require intense willpower in training and in running the actual race. In addition, I am planning on writing a novel in the month of November, something I have never done but which I have wanted to. As a result of these challenges, my fitness and my writing will both improve, and at the same time, my self-discipline will be further honed. I can only imagine what the next round of challenges will be after these! The exciting thing is that I am beginning to anticipate the fufillment of these challenges; I do not doubt my own resolve. My confidence in my abilities is growing.

However, I am still weak. I waste time that I should be productive with, reading news sites, obsessively checking email, and otherwise avoiding work. This must change, as my time on this planet is infinitely valuable, it is a finite consumable that will too soon be exhausted. Of course, there will always be room for improvement, but this aspect is one that certainly deserves my focus.

In conclusion, the month of self-discipline was a good first step. I am not yet a self-discipline ninja, but I am attempting to keep the momentum I've built in the month by commiting myself (perhaps overcomitting) to two new projects. I'll keep striving and working until one day I will have conquered my primal self and only the higher levels of consciousness will remain. My self-promise will be as good as gold. Someday, some distant day...